Hi!
On 25.11.19 18:26, sajolida wrote:
> u:
>> - under our mentoring in 2011 → "with our mentoring"
>
> I think that "under our mentoring" is more correct:
>
> https://ludwig.guru/s/under+the+mentoring
> https://ludwig.guru/s/with+the+mentoring
They have both the same amount of matches, no?
I like "with" because it makes it clear that it's also a collaboration,
and it sounds less patronizing.
>> - we still had a lot of work to make Tails easy to use by most people →
>> this sentence is a bit hard to read. What about "there was still a lot
>> of work to be done to make Tails easy to use"
>
> Your version is longer and use a passive voice which is usually
> considered as harder to read and more ambiguous. I tried to improve my
> sentence by adding a second verb, while keeping the active voice.
>
> See
> https://www.plainlanguage.gov/guidelines/conversational/use-active-voice/
Ack!
>> - "full-time, most of them part-time or freelance." → I would change
>> that sentence for reasons known to author by deleting "or freelance".
>> Freelance has nothing to do with how much you work.
>
> I changed "freelance" into "consultant", which is what we already have
> on /jobs.
>
> For me "part-time" means something stable but part-time (eg. 1 day a
> week), while consultant/freelance means "1 shot" (eg. on 1 contract).
I understand your reasoning better now. I guess a native speaker could
probably clear this up (not for this blog post because of time issues).
>> - freedom fighters → I have a bit of an issue with this term.
>
> I copied it from /contribute/mission where I thought that people would
> have more problems with "human-rights defenders". I'm personally fine
> with both.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Resistance_movement#Freedom_fighter says
"Generally speaking, freedom fighters are people who use physical force
to cause a change in the political and or social order. [...] a person
who is campaigning for freedom through peaceful means may still be
classed as a freedom fighter, though in common usage they are called
political activists [...]".
I also relate the word to people calling themselves freedom fighter but
actually being part of (proto) fascistic militias of all possible sorts.
Interesting that this word did not disturb me when you presented the
mission.
I see myself better represented in "human-rights defender" or
"political activist".
Cheers!
u.
